Funny thing happened at the gas pump. I know there’s nothing funny about gas or the price of it but thanks to the redneck in front of me, I did have a little chuckle. He was filling up his three-tone (brown, white and rust) supercharged truck. He must have been in a hurry; he didn’t even have time to dress. I could tell he was pissed off. Probably because he wanted to race to the next red light and had to stop for gas along the way. Now, I’m not the kind of guy who questions other people’s attire, but on this day I did. He was wearing a bath robe and slippers. Before I move on, I want to offer a tip. Never get gas behind a pickup truck at Native Canadian gas station. I will guarantee you he is packing a shit ton of jerry cans in the payload. This guy clearly had no shame. After the fill up, he walked in to pay and filled up an envelope with lottery tickets before leaving. There I was waiting right behind Cousin Eddie from Christmas vacation. Sometimes I feel like I’m bein...
They still have no smoking signs lit up in the airplanes. Smoking hasn’t been allowed for years but I guess they have to make sure. Just wondering. Who tells the engines? Safety tips Every trip starts with safety. How many Becky's and bob's have their head looking down at their cell phones instead? I would love to be the follow up guy for those who didn’t pay attention. Instead of handing out reward towels or peanuts, I’d hand out long underwear. For all passengers who didn’t take time to learn about safety. In the event of an emergency put your long underwear on pull down the flap in back and kiss your ass goodbye . Take your seat I try to stay slim. I want to sit in my assigned seat, not assigned seats. I think they should assign seats based on urinary function. To be assigned a window seat would depend. Do you have a good bladder or are you wearing depends? Nature calls Going to the bathroom on a train is doable. The side-to-side motion is usually easy...